1st Decade: The Beginning (1965-1974)
Around the world: Canada adopted its Red Maple Leaf flag, the Voting Rights Act was signed in the US, Malcolm X was assassinated, the Vietnam War escalated, the Indo-Pakistani War erupted, Winston Churchill died, and nations across Africa gained independence.
Amidst these world events, on a Wednesday morning in November of 1965, in the Coal City of Enugu, Eastern region of Nigeria, Hector and Violet Goma welcomed their last child. They called him, Abiye.
Early Years in Enugu: I have no recollection of my life in Enugu. My mum told me we had a cook, house help, gardener and driver. She was a full-time housewife while Dad was a senior civil servant.
The Civil War broke out and Dad made the decision to send us back to our village, Ogoloma. I can't recall if it was before or after my first birthday. He stayed back in Enugu with some men, extended family members.
In 1968, he decided to leave Enugu and return home with the uncles. They got to Aba and I heard that a stray bullet hit him and he died instantly. They buried him there in a shallow grave.
Growing Up in Ogoloma: The highpoint of my first decade was my mum. She was everything to me - mother, father, teacher and disciplinarian - boy, did she beat nonsense out of my head?
I grew up in the village and I was brought up by the entire village. Ogoloma is one of four towns and it is situated on the southern part of Okrika Island. The debate continues concerning who first settled on the Island. Our house is in Owubiri, one of the nine quarters in Ogoloma, less than five minutes' walk from the waterfront. I was (and I am still) the original Waterside Boy.
We had a week day routine. Wake up time was 5:30am. I hated it. I still don't like it. I'd beg for a little more sleep and Mum would ask me to shower first, by which time the sleep would have gone from my eyes.
Some days we would be out of the house by 6am, walking half an hour to a white garment prayer house for morning prayers. From there, another twenty-minute walk to Ogoloma Town School where she taught the Elementary 3 pupils. By 1970, before my fifth birthday, I started school.
Our home church. Mum was Secretary of Mothers Union and Women Christian Association for decades. Every child's ambition was to join the choir. The late H.I.C. Yebusike (formerly Long Williams) was our choirmaster who had a profound effect on me as a father figure.
From Soprano, Alto, Tenor to Bass (my last bus stop), my choirboy days lasted nearly three decades. To date, I can sing most hymns in any of the four parts.
Village Life: Mum was originally from Ogu. Some school holidays were spent visiting grandma there. Other times, I was opportune to spend part of the holiday with mum's uncle at 34 Accra Street, in the big city, Port Harcourt. Watching Agaba masquerade, having one Sunday lunch opportunity at Hotel Presidential and riding my cousin's bicycle were the great experiences.
Growing up in Ogoloma was richly fulfilling, marked by sound education, choral singing in school and church, outdoor play, exploration of uncompleted buildings, swimming in the river, eating in different houses, respect for elders. There were masquerades, traditional weddings, celebration of childbirth and mourning with the inevitable death of young and old.
There were unforgettable times when one was marched to someone's house to take a foul-tasting laxative to clear the tummy, or a visit to a patent medicine shop for the inevitable three-day chloroquine injection for malaria.
Mum earned only seventy three naira (N73.00) per month as a Grade C (untrained teacher) in those days. I don't know how she did it. To translate from a life of comfort to live in a match-box house, without a toilet or bathroom and bring up three children single-handedly. She had grit.
I can't remember ever hearing her tell me she loved me. No. That was not her way. She showed her love primarily by providing for us. Throughout my childhood and teenage years, there was never one day we lacked food in the house.
She showed flashes of "Senior Civil Service wife" by taking me on some holidays to Kaycee, Leventis or Kewalrams. I wore M&S socks and pants with new clothes for Children's Harvest and Christmas every year and Cortina shoes or sandals from Bata.
I have three sisters: Amoni, Tamunoibuomi and Ibiama, and one brother, Oraibi. Dad had one sister, Aunty Ibunge. Mum came from a large family. Her father Chief Hector Tubonibo Williams brought the U.N.A. (now First African Church) to Ogu.
Mum believed in me. Towards the end of my first decade, I took the Common Entrance Examinations to enter Secondary School. I was offered admission in the two State Secondary Schools I had selected but she would not let me accept any one of them. She was confident I would pass the entrance examination to Federal Government College, Port Harcourt. I was concerned because the dates to accept the other admissions had lapsed.
One afternoon, I was on the playground in school when a teacher handed a brown envelope to me which had my name printed on it. There was an oval stamp on the envelope - F.G.C. Port Harcourt.
I clutched the envelope and ran all the way home (over twenty minutes, non-stop) to break the good news!
I am because she was.
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